Sunday, April 18, 2021

Keep moving

Earlier this year, when I was out skiing, I saw this sign at the top of one of the lifts:


This hard-to-miss announcement serves as a reminder to quickly unload from the lift and move out of the way, since there is probably another chair full of skiers or snowboarders coming up right behind you. No one wants to be the reason they have to pause the entire lift because you couldn't get out of the way fast enough (been there—embarrassing). 

Given my penchant for searching for deeper meaning in the mundane, I wondered if this sign could be "a sign" of something more. 

The high school where I taught for six years has a very successful football program. Every year they go deep in the playoffs and, three times during my years there, they won state championships. One of my former teacher colleagues would always congratulate the team members he had in class after their title runs, telling them that they had accomplished something that few people get to experience. Then he would say to them, "Please, please don't make this the highlight of your life." 

In the moment, those comments could seem to be disparaging the team's achievements. His intention, however, was to guard these students against believing that any future accomplishments that do not receive as much praise or hoopla must be less important. In my experience, the most meaningful accomplishments often receive very little recognition. 

Those of you who are graduating soon have had an unusual (to say the least) ending to your collegiate career. It would be easy to look back and feel that you were cheated out of the "college experience" you were seeking. I believe that feeling, which is understandable, is partly because society has put so much pressure on making these years "the best years of your life." 

Honestly, the big lie in that expectation is that there is no one way you are "supposed" to do college. You have not had a lesser college experience if you had to work full-time in order to pay for school. Or if you lived at home. Or if the people you met here don't turn out to be lifelong friends. Or even if you had to take 14 months of online classes. That may have made your experience more exhausting, more taxing, or more challenging, but it doesn't invalidate what you gained during this time and it does not devalue your diploma. 

One of my main advisors during my doctoral studies once told me, "The only thing that earning a doctorate proves is that you are capable of taking on a long, arduous task and seeing it through to the finish." At the time, I didn't feel like that was the most robust endorsement of my decision to spend all of that time and money earning another degree. But, to a certain extent, he was exactly right. One of the most important things I learned during those years is that I AM capable of taking on long, arduous tasks and seeing them through to the finish. That's a skill I have definitely put into practice over the 12 years since I graduated (and a skill I have absolutely needed over the last 14 months). Knowing that I have accomplished difficult things in the past certainly helps me believe that I can make it through any current challenges. 

Going back to that ski lift, one thing I eventually picked up on is that when you get to the top, if you lean forward just enough on the chair, you get a little boost of momentum that can propel you forward. If you are sitting too far back, you just sort of plop on the ground and then you have to work a lot harder to get going. 

Seniors, before much longer, you'll be getting off the lift. You will have faced a long and arduous task that was made even more difficult due to the pandemic. You have persevered. You may not feel like you have thrived, but you have endured and you have made it to the finish. I promise, you will need those skills again in the future. 

It has been an honor to have been part of your journey at the University of Utah. Current circumstances may mean that there will be less fanfare this year than graduations typically receive. Nevertheless, I am celebrating your achievements and hope they will serve as a boost into whatever you choose to do next. 

Do not stop here. Keep moving. 

Love,
-brian



13 comments:

  1. Brian this was truly inspirational. While it may have been a mostly unspoken fear of mine, at times I have felt like I've been missing out on one of the best years of my life. Covid-19 took a year of normal college away from all us and its definitely been a challenge adjusting to that. However to have the expectation that our college is as good as it gets is naive and honestly a rather depressing prospect when you consider how much life we (God willing) have left to live. We can't control our circumstances, but we can control how we face them. We all took this year in stride and I know that struggle has helped me grow as a person. In a lot of ways life is what you make out of it and I have hope that there will be many "best times of my life" to come. Congratulations to all the Seniors, we'll miss you next year!

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  2. I loved this blog post. I think it was a great way to close the year and even those of us who aren't graduating can look back and reflect on all that we have gone through these last 14 months. I really liked the part about the best years of your life. I think that adults say that because for most it is four years of your life were you don't have real and hard adult responsibilities but you still are an adult, and many take that as we need to have constant fun and be happy because that ends. But there are other things than in person classes, parties, and events that make these some of the greatest years. I think as a whole we can all take what we have gone through and learned this year and use those skills over the many coming years of our lives. Thank you seniors! Non of your achievements went unnoticed or unrecognized. I can't wait to see what you all do with your lives and the good you will bring to this world. Congrats!

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  3. This summer, I figured that I could feel cheated, or I could roll with my online education and learn the most I possibly can in this format, this setting. I have, over this year, learned that I can do both of those things. I can acknowledge that I don't learn best in this format while ALSO taking it for what it is and learning what I can. I don't have to deny myself those feelings.
    With senior year approaching, it is starting to cross my mind-what am I, if not a student? So many aspects of myself and my life are tied up in being a student for these past 20 years. It's scary, and so exciting. It feels like soon, I'll be entering the real world. I am so excited to see how the graduating seniors do it, and what their take on "real life" is. We already know they are resilient and strong, and I look forward to seeing how they put these traits into action post graduation.

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  4. Not me crying at my computer typing this!!! I was really not excited to come back to school this year. I thought about taking a gap year, I dreaded the thought of having an altered experience. And truthfully, it really did suck, I feel like I would have had a MUCH more positive experience had it been business as usual. But the obvious aside, looking back on my time here I am starting to realize what it is I truly gained. Sure I didn't get to be in a ton of school shows, but I did vastly improve my skills to book other gigs. I learned how to take a long hard look at myself, my skills, and be honest with myself. I think I came here with a bit of an inflated ego for who knows why. I experienced a lot of insecurity and success, distaste of how I sound, look, move, but truly saw a significant different from start to finish. I learned how to take some really hard comments heard by professors, process them, take what I need from them, and keep moving. I think this has maybe been the greatest value. When I got here I was so concerned about what others thought and appearing talented that I let it get in the way of progress, I did so much people pleasing and doing exactly what I thought was what everyone wanted that I forgot that being a unique individual is what's interesting and exciting. When I started to take control and do the things that I felt were best for me, I felt so much more confident. This confidence translated to successes, and even if some people didn't like it, it was okay because I liked it. There's an argument to be said also about applying criticism which I am definitely capable of as well. I guess what I'm trying to say is that despite this shitty situation, I gained a lot of confidence, there are real physical/mental improvements in all aspects of my craft, I understand who I am as a person and as a performer, I endured a fucking pandemic dancing in my living room, and I am FINISHING.

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  5. Brian Manternach: forever the king of deep and genuine sentiment, beautifully crafted metaphors, and blogpost that engage and expand the brain. Gratitude wells from my heart as I digest this blogpost, and remember the throngs of experiences wherein you have supported, encouraged, and aided my growth and expansion (and I know this experience is shared by many others). I thank you from the bottom of my hear, and look fondly forward towards our final year together at the U <3

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  6. Brian, the nostalgia and sentimentality is hitting too hard!! So beautifully said. This has been such a wild week/year of mixed emotions and this does a great job of summing it up. I find it nearly impossible to believe that we are already at the end of this school year. While not originally how I pictured my sophomore year of college going, this year has been incredibly valuable for me as an artist and as a person. I was living by myself, truly giving me time to look inwards on what I want out of life. While my social life was a bit *reduced* this year given the circumstances, I've found strength within myself. Now that I am close to being fully vaccinated, I can work on building the social part back up, but damn has it been a year. I am finally in a place where I actually enjoy watching videos of myself without majorly cringing. I am proud of the art that I create. I am so looking forward to next year as we are once again in person (at least in some capacity, hopefully!) and we can work on more collaborative art. Thank you for all you've done to support us as students this year Brian!! :)

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  7. Brian you really know just what to say when we need it most. This month has been kicking my ass and this past year has been insane in practically every way. I never imagined this is how I would spend my freshman year of college, my first year away from my family, but I wouldn't change my experiences for any difference in this crazy year. With the world going the way it is and things looking up I can only imagine what these next years can hold. Thank you for being such an amazing and encouraging part of my year Brian.

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  8. I'M GOING TO MISS OUR SENIORS SO MUCH!!! I still think of you all as "the sophomores" from when I was a freshman :') I loved this blog post so much, Brian, because, even though I am not graduating this year, I have been having a lot of anxiety about what I am going to be doing after I graduate. That my best years will be behind me and that I had to do school during a pandemic. But that is simply NOT TRUE!!! I know that there are so many more things for me to experience in my future and that I have only experienced just a small amount of what my life is and will be. I am excited and terrified for senior year, but I am ready to keep improving on my craft and making myself a more rounded artist.

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  9. The quote that your former teacher colleague said really resonated with me. I worried this past year and debated whether I peaked in high school because I miss all of my friends and I miss the shelter-like environment that I lived in and I miss the downtown area I was nearby. But what you said, really made me think about it more and more. It’s ok that I enjoyed my high school career, but I shouldn’t focus on whether I’ll be able to experience that again, but rather I should take what I learned and move on, and create more happy memories, and right now, we’re in a global pandemic, so I shouldn’t be too hard on myself. This year wasn’t what any of us expected, but nonetheless, I still gained a lot of valuable friends and life experience. It wasn’t how I expected to spend my freshman year, but I’m glad I made it through because the pandemic changed me into the person I am today. I’m proud of you seniors and I’m so excited to see where y’all go!!! :)

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  10. Last Blog. It's really weird to think how fast this semester. I know that this isn't how anyone wanted this semester to go, but I can still walk away from this semester knowing that I am continuing to grow. I am so thankful that I am going to get another two years to get ready for the big world we live in. That sign really got me thinking that I need to take advantage of this summer and makes sure to keep moving forward even though we are not in class doesn't mean we stop working. Thank you Brian for such a great year!


    Alex Fish

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  11. Wow this vlog is a very nice capstone to finish off the semester. Honestly it makes me hopeful in a way. My track is a little different than my classmates considering I'm not leaving right away. I do feel slightly stagnated, but it's good to realize that I still need to keep moving forward and can't stop to worry about what I've done. Good Vlog! Thank you Brian for everything you do. The past 4 years have been incredibly inspirational and educational. We probably wont see each other every week, but I promise I'll come back for more vocal coaching when you and Julie are back in the same room again!

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  12. Such an amazing blog to end off on! I really loved and resonated with this one! While I have no idea what the seniors and other upperclassmen have endured, I do understand the struggles. I missed out on my senior year of high school and then started college under these crazy circumstances. I’ve definitely had moments where I felt like I’ve been cheated out of so much but it’s taken time to realize what I’m doing now still matters and will still help me in the future. While my start to college has not been a super great one, I do think it still has as much value. This was super inspiring to read and this whole experience has been a great one. It’s been a rough journey but I’m excited to keep going. I’ve only now gotten on the lift and don’t know what will wait for me when I get off it but I’m ready to get to work in the meantime! Thanks for all your help this year Brian! That’s a wrap on freshman year!!!

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  13. WOW Im actually crying reading this blog. I'm not a senior but it has been a super rough semester for me. My mind always goes to the thought that this pandemic is taking so much out of my learning and growth. But, even though it was much harder and felt like I wasn't doing as much, I was still growing and making big improvements in my education. This blog was so inspiring. I feel like I really do have a different outlook on the last yer after reading this. If you are always sitting back and dwelling on the negatives its going to be much harder to make a recovery. But when you sit forward (and lean as you come to the top of the ski lift) you set yourself up to have more success in the future.
    -Caden

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