As performers, I think we have all experienced the discomfort that comes with self-conscious feelings. For me, in those times I seem to not only be focused on what I’m doing, but I’m also anticipating what other people are thinking about what I’m doing. As a result, I can start to question every decision I make and second guess whether they’re the right choices. That’s the irony of self-consciousness: even though “self” is part of the word, it seems to have just as much to do with how we are thinking about others.
Taking the words at their face value, there really shouldn’t be anything wrong with being “self-conscious.” As singers, we have to be conscious of self so we can make intentional choices with our technique. I talk a lot about choosing a strategy before you sing and then evaluating that strategy and its effectiveness after you sing. If you are not aware of what you are doing, then any success is accidental or haphazard. It may achieve some great results once in a while (and there’s something to be said for getting “out of your head” and just singing) but it isn’t a method for developing a reliable technique.
Sure enough, Merriam-Webster defines “self-conscious” in two ways. The first definition is the one we probably think of most often: “uncomfortably nervous about or embarrassed by what other people think about you.” These are the voices of doubt that inevitably creep into our heads.
But the second definition of “self-conscious” is the one that I prefer: “done in a way that shows an awareness of the effect that is produced : done in a deliberate way.” In other words, it’s merely the act of consciously monitoring your “self.” In this form of self-consciousness, there is no room for anyone else’s criticism—especially the criticism we imagine in our heads that others must be thinking about us, even if they’re not.
One of my mentors introduced me to the phrase, “What you think of me is none of my business.” Sure, I listen to advice and I look for constructive criticism and direction as needed. In the end, however, we all have to make our own choices. In making those choices, if we’re too self-conscious (first definition) and focus on how others may be judging us, it can interfere with being self-conscious (second definition) and allowing our choices to be intentional and entirely our own.
What is your experience with self-conscious singing (both definitions)?
How has your singing been going this week?
Now go practice.
My experience with singing, to be honest has only related to the first definition. I am an extremely self conscious singer because I have never considered myself a person that can "sing". Therefore anytime I am asked to do so I get very worried about what others are thinking and completely forget about myself in the equation. I find myself completely concerned about how I am appearing from the outside instead of focusing on myself and my performance. I have never been a shy or self conscious person but when it comes to singing I feel as if I am powerless, it is very strange.
ReplyDeleteBeing for focused on myself well singing and becoming all around more confident is something I certainly want to focus on and hope to improve on significantly this week and the ones following.
-Sofia :)
I've always been a self conscious (definition one) performer. I think that's because I know how much there is to know and to learn and it's tough to be satisfied with what I can deliver when there's such a vast void of growth and experience that I have yet to fill.
ReplyDeleteI'm interested in the repercussions of being definition two self conscious when that reality isn't positive. When if you're being honest, your voice doesn't meet your goals or doesn't sound the way it should or can't do what you need it to stylistically or pitch-wise. I also think that it's incredibly difficult to figure out how to separate what opinions matter and WHEN they matter. We are paying thousands of dollars for other people's opinions on us and on our work. The difficult part is parsing out what is important and what is useful and separating the construction or deconstruction of our work with the value we place on ourselves.
My singing has been all over the place lately trying to figure out how to make the sounds that I want consistently through the range and consistently day to day. I haven't had much time to think about it because of Bring It On.
I actually touched on this topic a bit in my last post -- I've been the first definition of self-conscious with my singing for pretty much my entire life. Before I came to this program, I didn't have any proper singing teaching, so I was always embarrassed to sing, thinking that I wasn't near good enough to be singing aloud or in public. I still struggle with this; ever since I have been involved with theatre, I have always been around people with more singing experience than I have, so I've always felt inadequate. Even when by myself, there's something that's very vulnerable I think about singing aloud, so in situations like I mentioned, it's still difficult for me.
ReplyDeleteWith the second definition, I think I've seen dramatic differences in the last few years since I have been properly taking lessons both privately and in class through the department. Things as simple as lifting my soft palate and proper breathing are corrections/awarenesses that I try to bring every time I open my mouth to sing. I do my best to internalize everything that's taught to me in all my classes, and singing is no exception. I always try to improve on what I've learned each and every day.
I've been finding proper time that works best with my schedule to sing this week which has been great, and I also found the straw, so I have been using the straw for those exercises and have been actually really enjoying them!
It hasn't been until recently that the first definition of being a self-conscious singer has come into my vocabulary. Because I grew up performing and singing from such a young age, I have never cared what people think of my singing. There are lots of times where I find it easier to sing and convey a story with more confidence than a monologue. However, because I have been training for over a year, there are so many bits of information I am trying to incorporate, and applying those tools to singing has been a challenge. I have become more self conscious of what people are thinking when I am singing, because I am constantly being critiqued and watched, and I am thinking about if I am applying alexander technique, breathing technique, and any other acting techniques to my singing. While, yes, I consider what people think of me, I think I am more of the second definition of a self conscious singer. Because singing is more of a skill I am still learning, not something I am showcasing because I want to be perfect. Recently, as I continue to practice singing, I find that when I use too much breathe, my voice get tired very fast. I need to learn how to utilize the amount of breath I can use on each note or line, so I don't run out to fast, or have to much and pass out.
ReplyDeleteLindsie Kongsore
I know that I get very self-conscious (definition one) when I am audition. I always find myself apologizing....Like oh here is the thing I have prepared I know it's not the most amazing thing but here I am anyway. I think that this is something that holds me back a lot. Because if I could be as confident as I am in the shower in auditions I feel like I would be much more impressive! But I know that when I am self conscious (as in definition two) then I tend to do better. If I am focusing on the work, or being in the moment (which, incidentally you can't focus on or you're not really in the moment), then I tend to perform at my best. When I find myself feeling nervous about an audition I am going to be a self conscious performer and be aware of what I am doing and how I am using my technique to tell the story!
ReplyDeleteI've always considered myself a self conscious person which can be both good and bad. I know with practice I can become better and better but I have always been self conscious when singing and acting. I always want to do the "right thing"and look perfect. I think it's good to want to do your best, but you shouldn't ever let others affect your skills in a negative way. You just got to brush away the haters and keeping doing the best you can do AMI RIGHT LADIES?!
ReplyDeleteI personally have worked very hard over the past two years to become more confident in my singing. I realized its all a mental thing that you have to overcome. When you make the choice to stop being so self conscious I feel like it also improves your voice. Nerves do nothing to improve the voice so there's no point in having them.
ReplyDeleteFor me, self-conscious performing is a result of one of two things:
ReplyDelete1. Being under-prepared
2. Performing something I'm not comfortable performing
(I'm mostly going to talk about #2...)
Obviously we only want to share something if we feel like it's worthy of sharing, and because of the training here at the U, I have been asked to share my weaknesses so many times. Obviously it is for my own good and I am very grateful for it because it has already made me grow in so many ways, but it is still a hard thing to do. Singing a legit song in dem lab is probably among my least favorite things in the world. (Was that dramatic?) I feel like my head voice is weak and quiet and I feel like people are saying/thinking "I can't even hear her. Why is she in the program" (hahaha that's so mean) With that said, I feel like I'm on a steady incline where my head voice is concerned--it has gotten so much stronger, and I'm getting more and more comfortable sharing it.
I have always been self conscience (definition one) about my singing. I have always been more confident moving and dancing. My previous voice teachers would try to help me work out my nerves singing in front of people in various ways, but nothing really seemed to make a difference. My nerves still held me back. When I started taking singing and private lessons from Brian, I began to learn the science and technicality behind what I was doing, and since I have more of the math/science brain, this has helped me a lot. I am able to identify what is happening and, if necessary, change it. It feels like I'm not flying blind anymore. I have found that I'm still self conscience (definition one) about my singing, but I'm slowly beginning to identify more with definition two, and it's helping me gain confidence.
ReplyDeleteI am extremely self conscious when I sing. Like Cece, I consider myself a dancer much more than I consider myself a singer. I have started to become a lot more confident in my voice because I am trying to not judge myself so much and focus on working on my technique, rather than comparing myself to others. I do that a lot, and that is what keeps me from fully reaching my potential as a singer. If I do not think so much about how other people sound compared to me, but how I sound compared to my past self, I think I will improve quicker.
ReplyDeleteMy voice has been more relaxed this week, with having a few days off from Bring It On, but I am physically exhausted, which does not help the voice. I have been taking my practice slowly this week, as to not tire myself out too much.
I feel like I am a bit back and forth with both of these definitions of self conscious singing. All throughout my life, I've been worried about how others see me when I sing (1st definition) and it has always been a struggle to get over it. I was told by my siblings when I was younger that I couldn't sing and I should stop trying. I know it's ridiculous and that they were just messing with me because they are my siblings, but those kinds of comments stay with you and they can stay with you for a long time. I was very conscious of how I sounded to anyone after that. I even had this mentality right up until I started the second semester of singing here in the ATP Program. I was always nervous about how people heard me and that they would make fun of how I'd sing until I was forced to confront that fear on a weekly basis in class and in singing without a musical accompaniment in As You Like It. My thought process in singing has now shifted towards mainly the second definition. I now am way more focused on breathing, the lyrics, and in being in the world of the song. I'm more confident now of how I sing and even though sometimes I momentarily revert back to the thinking of the first definition, at the end of the day, it's about helping myself relay the message of the song to the audience. As long as I focus on that, I can't go wrong.
ReplyDeleteMy singing this week has been alright. My voice has been getting really foggy lately. Might be the altitude and seasons changing, might be my acid reflux acting up again. I'm thinking of investing in a decent humidifier. Other than that, all is well.
I have always been a self-conscious person. As a child, I think I was concerned about what others think, but I like to believe I've grown out of that. It's been a lot of self-talk to convince myself to not care what others think about me. As an adult, however, I think I'm more concerned with what I think of myself. I'm a total perfectionist. If something I do isn't what I think is "perfect" or even "adequate" I become discouraged. I'm trying to shift my thinking so that I view everything I do as improvement. Even if it doesn't sound "perfect," I'm still learning and making progress.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was younger and even now, I've been self conscience and have always cared about what other people thought of me. It has affected my voice and has made me nervous, especially in Dem lab with all my peers around me. Lately, I have really tried to focus on singing for me and not for anyone else because this is my career and the thing I love most. I need to love myself first and that is when I will do my best. I believe my confidence has grown a lot between this year and last! The last dem lab I did, I was very pleased with my performance. I hope to continue on that same track.
ReplyDeleteI have found that the better I feel as a person the less nervous I get when singing. It's strange how that works but that really shouldn't surprise me anymore, knowing how connected everything in the body truly is. It's been a while since I have been legitimately self conscious in the first definition while singing. It brings me such joy to sing and I am relatively self assured in it that is rare for me to get that self conscious it in that definition anymore. I was however quite nervous to sing in your class the other day because some of my best friends had never heard me sing. In the other sense I feel like many aspects of my singing are on auto pilot at this point in my life, besides hitting very high notes/blending while I'm sick, and of course keeping the sound forward. I feel like the more things you master with singing the less you need to constantly moniter and you can move on to continuing to learn new things. This is a primary focus in my practice right now because I just need to be able to count on the breath support as opposed to have to focus on it when I am also thinking about blending and hitting high notes with the right vowels. So I find this concept exciting
ReplyDeleteI find that in my lessons, I feel more "self-conscious" as in I am actively strategizing, trying, executing, etcetera. I always feel like my most "successful" singing comes during my lesson. However, when having to present myself in front of others and sing, the former definition of "self conscious" kicks in and overrides the self consciousness I ought to be focusing on. I then, instead of focusing on how to do well and sing to the best of my ability at that time on that day, focus on how not to mess up. Clearly, I cognitively am aware that being self conscious in my strategy would serve me more than allowing the more distracting and possibly detrimental form of consciousness take over and affect my performance. I think making an effort to rely more on relaxation, strategy, and technique will serve me better and more consistently going forward.
ReplyDeleteWell singing is a very vulnerable thing, and specifically talking about us, it's even more vulnerable than the average person undergoes because we are constantly judged and picked apart by our instrument being a part of a musical theatre program. I choose to live by the second definition when it comes to being self aware. Once you are able to cut off the nagging opinions of others and just listen to your own voice, it's the healthiest option for a lot of reasons. Jonathan Groff, who has made a great career for himself literally teaches himself how to perfectly execute a song and a character. Being a well known performer, he has probably heard every opinion without even asking for it. But still he's able to tune it out and be self-conscious in his own instrument and is able to figure it out every time. Another thought with being (self) self-conscious, there can come a point where we can be unsatisfied with our voice or progress and it's easy to doubt ourselves. That idea starts to bleed into the first definition of being self-conscious, but not from the thoughts of others, but the thoughts from ourselves. I think the best way to bounce back after thoughts like this, (because let's face it, we're human, and we all have doubting thoughts) is to just sing. It can be very healthy to put technique to the side for a second, and re remind ourselves why we love to sing and the positive affect it can have on our daily lives. Once we can feel grounded in our abilities and craft once again, we can go back to growing positively in our instruments.
ReplyDeleteSinging this week has been a little difficult because of a bug I caught last weekend, so I have been very self-conscious in my voice in how not to hurt it, but still not lose progress and keep moving forward. I have been focusing on the musicality and dynamics of my songs, as well as the lyrics. I'm hoping to be healthy before my next lesson!
I really liked this post and it really got me to thinking. As singers there is always going to be someone better at singing that we are envious of and because of this we often compare our voices to other singers. But why are we critical of our voices when listening to other voices? I finally came to the conclusion that every voice is different and we are still very young. Who knows what our voices can do and how they can grow. Sometimes something will just click in our heads and our progress can be immense. I think that when we are listening to singing, rather then being self concious and beating up our own confidence we should say "wow that is very good, now what can I do to help myself get to that level". There is always gonna be someone better, I think it's healthier to forget about those people and focus instead on how you are better from being less self conscious. Practice is going well and I'm excited to be back in the swing of thing. Every time I sing I think I am both definitions of self conscious. I am aware of what I am doing and making musical decisions for myself but and always self-conscious about the sounds I am making and whether or not they are the right sound or if people will like it.
ReplyDeleteI in general, am an extremely self conscious person( the first definition) however, dependent on how prepared I am with the song I am singing I am self-concious or self- confident. For example, with my go to audition song I am extremely confident. However, my new song that I'm singing in dem lab this week I will be terrified. The semesters here I have become a more self conscious singer in the sense of becoming aware of my problems and not always singing pretty to help create a stronger voice. I am feeling better the moisture in the air has definitely helped my voice. So i can begin practicing more rigorously again.
ReplyDeleteIn my experience with singing, I definitely am gravitating towards the first definition at the moment. I constantly find that I am rather running out of breath all the time, or just sort of seize upland look like an expressionless robot because I am so self-conscious of the audience in front of me. I am making a strong effort to gravitate towards the second definition, but it is something that will take time. I think I just need to constantly remind myself to be more self aware and less outwardly aware. My singing has been going very well this week. My life has become less crazy and I am falling into a regular schedule. My throat has cleared up and I am not sick anymore. I feel like I am slowly starting to improve.
ReplyDeleteI have noticed in the past that I have been more self-conscious in the sense of worrying about what other people think of my technique. This has been something I have struggled with in the past and strive to get past, each time I am given a new task or performance opportunity. I have noticed that each time I am able to be self-conscious in a good and positive (technique improving) way, I am much more successful in my overall performance.
ReplyDeletePersonally I feel that being self-conscious of your technique and possible vocal outcomes is hard to accomplish sometimes. I think one of my main goals is to switch out my self-consciousness of what other people think of my singing, with self-conscious of my technical and vocal choices. This is something I have used in the past and it has benefitted me greatly. I noticed that when I am aware of my technique, and what choices I should make next ultimately boosts my confidence and overall performance.
Practice this week started off kind of rough, but I caught ahold of my schedule as the week went on. I think it is important to find a piece that you really love, and this week that has boosted my practice quality tremendously. Overall this week has been a good week for warming up as well as song work too.
I always feel "self-conscious" about my singing. In my private lessons I feel so good about myself but the second I have to sing in front of people, I get really nervous. I think it's strange that I always feel nervous singing to a small group of people that I know but I don't feel as nervous to sing on stage to 2000 strangers. Which is why it is hard for me to sing in class sometimes, because I don't feel like I can fail with no consequences because the people that will see me fail are the people that I have to spend all my time with, the people that I absolutely DO NOT want to see me fail. It is something that I have been getting better about as I have progressed through the class, and now I can build my singing talent in my private lessons and build my confidence in group class!
ReplyDeleteI am often a self-criticizer (especially during performances), this happens most often when I am acting. I really love examining what I am doing and getting feedback from others, but I have a hard time focusing on not doing it in a performance and completely investing in my character.
ReplyDeleteAs for singing, I started to finally improve in my overall vocal health near the end of this week so I have started practicing back nearer to my normal range, and I hope to be able to do full practice sessions this next week (finally, it's about time).
I have been an extremely self-conscious singer for as long as I can remember. Mostly due to made up assumptions in my head of what other people think of me. For example, I am extremely uncomfortable and very tense whenever I have to sing something that is considered high for my vocal range. I especially feel self-conscious when I have to sing in front of my peers, because I feel that their criticism is less constructive than a voice teacher or a seasoned performer. As for the second definition, I am absolutely conscious and sometimes overly conscious of everything that I do while I sing. Right now I am trying to break a bad habit of breathing incorrectly while singing and I would also love to get more acclimated to singing higher. My singing has definitely had its ups and downs this past week. I have been practicing my Italian song in the School of Music practice rooms whenever I have free time. I have a friend who plays the piano who is able to accompany me, which is always a major bonus. I have been practicing my Italian song in the higher key so that it will be much easier to sing in the lower key; I alternate between the two keys accordingly.
ReplyDelete-Burke Schoeppl
I am often a self conscious person (first definition) but over the last year at the U, I have definitely been able to start being more self-conscious in the constructive way. Becoming more aware of myself has definitely been a journey since I began college. Taking the acting, voice, and singing lessons required has definitely allowed me to grow more self aware. After taking a break from singing for a year or so, I am trying to get my vocal technique back. Because I am learning how to sing the healthy way, I have actually become more self-conscious (first definition) of my voice since the beginning of this school year. I am in the middle of a transition to having healthier habits as a performer and while working on that, I have become a lot less comfortable with my sound and breath. I can't wait until I am comfortable and confident again!
ReplyDeleteI am the most self conscious when singing or performing for my peers, I don't have much of a problem once I am in front of an audience and through a rehearsal process. Much of the technique and work I have put into my singing will often fly out the window once I become nervous or self conscious and the focus just becomes to get through instead of playing or expressing or whatever. Again with practice this week, my high notes are weak and my break is pronounced.
ReplyDeleteI feel that more often than not, when I perform, I experience a combination of the two definitions. I try to focus on training and technique, and am conscious about what I am trying to do as I sing, but I'm also aware of what I sound like, how blocked I am, how I didn't pull off that one note the way I hoped... and am constantly wondering what those who are watching are thinking of me. It's so much going on in my head at once that more often than not, it can trip me up and make my performance more exhausting than it needs to me.
ReplyDeleteI have always felt self conscious when singing and its usually a problem with comparing myself to others. In the last few years its gotten better as the phrase "Everyone is on their own path." has been introduced to my daily mantra when practicing and watching others. But working in front of others is still scary because I am always wondering if they are judging my work in progress as what should be a final product.
ReplyDeleteThe second definition is something thats harder to work against more recently for me because my inner critic will take one thing during a performance and then dwell on it for the rest of the performance thereby taking me out of the moment and messing up everything else, like a snowball effect. For example in Bring It On during Cross the Line I had a hard stunt to do and if I didn't land it perfectly, I would be thrown off for the rest of the number and even sometimes the rest of the show.
Getting out of that headspace has come in to my practice when I try to get lost in the story and the character once the technique is there so that my head is full of character thought and motivation instead of self criticism.
Madeleine Rush
When I was a kid, I never had a problem breaking out in song in the middle of anywhere and just going with it. But judgement and cruel children ruined that side of me once school became a thing. I've tried breaking past that self-conscious part of me that thinks people are judging me for just being who I am. Then, I get technique truly involved with my voice and I always worry if I'm doing the song in the way that I am supposed to be singing it and what I need to fix. The truth is I need to think of it more as "improving" than "fixing" and being able to do the correct technique while having fun singing in random places. Once I can be comfortable with that, Dem Lab will be a piece of cake.
ReplyDeleteUp until I was 21 I always did everything with great confidence and was very excited to perform. Something changed when I was 21 and I became very negatively self conscious. I would worry always about every movement made and every sound produced when singing. I would worry about what the audience would think. In class I would self-critique and apologize before people could even give me their opinion. It was detrimental. I was adding layer upon layer of worries and stress I didn't need when performing. It got so bad that I once performed a piece, and afterwards I asked my vocal coach, bless that bitches heart, how I did. She told me, "It would have been better if any of the notes were on tune." I honestly didn't hit one note because there was too much tension.
ReplyDeleteIt took the last three years of my life to work on regaining that confidence I had in high school and to relearn technique to help me be more self conscious, in the good way. I still have a long way to go, but I've come so damn far.
Singing is going well.
The best personal example I could use to speak on the first definition of self-conscious singing would be during my senior year of high school. I I took an independent voice study class in which I got to work on a lot of repertoire, and then perform it for the class and sometimes the fine arts department at my school. Also in this class was another senior boy who was the same part and type as me, and we were always competitive toward each other. When I would have to sing in front of him, I definitely always worried too much about what he thought of the performance. A good example of the second definition would be when I played Horton into school at a local community theater. Each night in rehearsal when I would sing I found myself trying different things to figure out what the best approach to the material was in order to make a great performance. I have definitely had a lot of times where I have experienced BOTH forms of self-conscious singing, but I would definitely agree that the second definition of it is much more productive.
ReplyDelete~Jacob Weitlauf~
First definition: I am an EXTREME self-conscious singer. I don't feel as if I can control my voice, and I don't think I would care except that there feels to me to be an expectation that by this point in my life and in the career field I am I should be able to clearly and confidently carry a tune.
ReplyDeleteSecond definition: To be completely honest, I don't think I've ever experienced this type of self-consciousness in my public singing. In practice I feel like I've had good sessions where I feel like I have solid mastery on all of my choices and I have a great awareness of what I'm doing.
I have been recovering from a little cold, so my voice has been really tired. It's limited the duration of my practice sessions, and earlier week I felt that my practice was almost counteractive to my recovery. I took a few days of rest though, and now I feel great and ready to get back at it.
For the first definition, I would say that as a I was younger I was little too oblivious to really notice if someone didn't like my singing. But as I got into my teens I found that I got self conscience having to sing in front of other people, but then I decided in my sophomore that if I was singing the notes on pitch and saying the words to the best of my ability that I really shouldn't worry. I found that this helped keep my sing as something cathartic.
ReplyDeleteThinking about it now after reading this, I have realized I am self-conscious more in the sense of the first definition. I have all these inner cobwebs about what others think of me and how I sound that I have resulted to sometimes not singing casually around other people like when I am in a car or a party. I allow the fear of what other's think of me to get in the way of my practice and confidence in myself and my talent.
ReplyDeleteI need to remind myself that I have a worthy talent that I can critique and shape, myself.
I consider myself very self-conscious, particularly in my voice. After reading that second definition for self-conscious, though, I realize that in the end, it all comes down to me. I've really started to make an effort in avoiding what other people think of me, because most of the time, I end up thinking negative thoughts. In David's Pedagogy class, we talked about psychological cobwebs, or things that hold us back as singers due to preconceived notions. I feel that these negative thoughts that I have in my head turn into cobwebs and ultimately hold me back.
ReplyDeleteSo, without trying to seem arrogant or cocky, I've been telling myself that I am talented, and I have something to bring to the table with my voice. While some may not like my singing (auditions for example),I just pick myself up and move on knowing that I tried my best. No need to degrade myself. Instead, I should be aware of perhaps what went wrong as well as what worked, and then strive for improvement. That's all we can do as musical theatre students who are always looking for auditions.
Many times in singing class I've experienced self-conscious singing. My voice would often break, or I'd have trouble hitting a note I swore I could hit when practicing on my own. Thankfully, the more and more I'd get up and sing in front of people, the more ease I found with myself which allowed me to feel more confident when singing. A conscious choice I've made that has helped me greatly when performing, is to put more focus on the intention of what I'm singing: Who I'm singing to and why. This is a much more effective way for me to perform more comfortably and in my opinion sound better than when I worry more about technique and forgoe intention.
ReplyDeleteI find that I feel confident and positive about my voice when singing alone or in lessons, but when it comes to auditions or any performance where I can see audience reaction, I tense up immensely. I lose quite a few notes at the top of my range or I find difficulty in switching between, for example, my head voice and my mix. Once that starts happening, I think of probably a thousand things that could go wrong from there. Ultimately, I end up thinking more about how I messed up or how awful I think I sound instead of moving on and fixing what I had previously done. Recently, I've felt a lot better about audition situations in particular; I think I have songs that make me feel good and generally I feel great about performing. The key for me is to make sure that I have a good warmup because then I know that at least I prepared myself. Additionally, I think it is important that I prep myself in a way that keeps me from focusing too much on how I sound and more on actions, intention, and moment-to-moment work.
ReplyDeleteOne experience I've had with the first definition would be when I had my singing mock audition. It was the first round and I was very nervous about getting it right and it was so bad that I choked on my words haha. With the second definition I've noticed it a few times when I've been singing in class like if I notice I'm not breathing I correct myself or I correct my posture if it's off too. I think my singing this week has actually been pretty good. I think I'm getting more confident in myself.
ReplyDeleteI think that being in voice lessons, and simply making singing a regular part of my life has really helped in both of these aspects of "self-conscious singing." I felt a lot more comfortable this last week, going in to the two mock-auditions than I do at most auditions, and I think this is mostly to do with the fact that I've simply been doing it for almost four years now. Getting out of your head and letting the work speak for itself without judgement is something that I think really just takes time to develop; so I really appreciate the structure of voice in this program, and feel good about my progress towards increasing self-conscious singing and eliminating self-conscious singing.
ReplyDeleteI have always been a very self-conscious singer. I compensate for this by trying to act silly when I sing. An example would be my singing of "True Love" the other day in class. I deliberately acted silly, and I had justified this to myself prior; if people were laughing, I couldn't be doing that bad. It was not until afterwards that I realized how much of a crutch I make humor into. It's something I've always done with situations in both singing and other performing activities. The justification I make is that if I'm funny, then perhaps others won't notice whatever issues I may have. This is detrimental to my practice; I ought to be aware of my mistakes and be comfortable making them. I need to be able to be present in my singing and not in detracting from it. Hopefully through this I can grow more self-conscious in the sense of the latter definition.
ReplyDeleteThere are sometimes when I feel really confident in my singing and other times I am defining what it means to be "self conscious". Sometimes I find it difficult to be surrounded by such beautiful singers and having to show my voice around them as well. I consider myself to sing well, but not to the degree that I will be on broadway one day. But singing shouldn't be about who sounds better or what is considered better technique. It should be about confidence in something I enjoy doing and ultimately just having fun. I think I need to work on not getting so far in my head that I am already setting myself up for failure by being too self conscious. I need to practice on enjoying my voice and being confident in the work I am putting out.
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